Some of my Favorite Products from Amazon

Alright everyone, prepare yourself for a very long list of some of my favorite products from Amazon!

I recently became an affiliate with Amazon and your support would mean the WORLD to me! You can go ahead and click on the title of the product and it will take you directly to that item!

Add to cart and Purchase! It really is that easy!

Beauty:

Aztec Secret Healing Clay Mask

This mask is one of the absolute best ones that I have found! I use equal parts of clay and ACV & leave it on for about 15 mins – then I use a washcloth and warm water to remove.

Thayers Witch Hazel Astringent

After I wash my face, I put some of this toner on a cotton round and wipe my entire face and neck to remove any excess dirt and oils.

Egyptian Magic

Okay, so this is like a holy grail…it is an ALL PURPOSE skin cream. You put some in your hands and rub your hands together until it forms into an oil (helps with absorption) and then apply! I use it as a lip balm, on my entire face, hands, rough skin areas, hair treatment, eye cream, scar treatment, etc. It is also great for eczema, skin irritations and redness, burn and wound relief.

Grande Lips – Hydrating Lip Plumper

I love this stuff! You don’t even need to take my word for it, just check out before and after pictures!

Wet Brush Pro Epic Quick Dry Hair Brush

This is probably the best brush I have ever used! You need one at home and one on the go!

AMIKA The Wizard Detangling Primer

I LOOOOVE this product and the smell of it is a huge bonus! I use it after my shower, in the morning, before I style my hair, etc. It is a great detangler AND primer for your hair and I also like to think of it as a perfume for my hair because it smells so amazing.

Matcha Eye Masks

So I’ve tried multiple eye masks and these are by far my favorite – & they actually work! I like to keep mine in the fridge. These are very hydrating – I leave mine on for about 15-30 mins depending on my schedule. When you remove them you can see and feel that the masks are thinner because the product was actually absorbed into your skin. They help with aging, reducing puffiness and dark circles.

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Fashion:

Sojos Sunglasses

I am so glad I found this brand of sunglasses! They literally have a style for everyone! These are my absolute favorite though – I have them in more than one color!

Fashionable Leather Backpack

I literally take this bag with me everywhere. The straps are comfortable, the inside of the bag is spacious and it is easy to stay organized! The durability ceases to amaze me with such an inexpensive  and fashionable bag!

Key Ring Wristlet

If you haven’t heard of these, seen them or purchased one…I am sorry! This is a lifesaver!

High-Waisted Leopard Bathing Suit

Very flattering and comfortable bathing suit! Love the pattern and bright colors!

Bandeau High-Waisted Cheetah Print Bathing Suit

I have this in multiple colors – I love it so much. The material and fit are super comfortable and it is very flattering for every body type!

Why Be Racist Sexist Homophobic or Transphobic Shirt

One of my favorite conversation starter t-shirts. The fit and quality of this shirt are amazing! Better than expected.

UGG Womens Bailey Button Triplet II Boot

I mean…do I need to say anything at all? UGG boots are where its at.

Black Ultra Lightweight Knitted Non Slip Womens Shoes

These athletic shoes have been great for daily wear, working out, travel and yard work! Not to mention they are super stylish! I highly recommend them.

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Home:

Everlasting Comfort Faux Fur Throw

This blanket is literally everything I could have ever imagined and more. I honestly thought that it was just another throw blanket to have around the house…until I received it in the mail. It is incredibly soft, silky, cozy, warm and lightweight. I have severe anxiety and this blanket is calming to me. It is my new favorite.

Mean Girls Magnets

I mean…do you even go here? Of course I have these magnets & honestly, you need them too.

Grey and White Brick Peel & Stick Wallpaper

If you haven’t seen it already – I did an accent wall in my bedroom about a year ago and it is seriously the best thing to come home to. It was simple to install and the finish is amazing!

Macrame Plant Hanger

I need about 7 more of these bad boys in my house! It was so easy to hang up and it is very durable. It really does add something special to my house decor. (Flower print is from Arielle Vey).

Super Soft Faux Sheepskin Fur Area Rug

Okay, I have a couple of these. I love faux fur – apparently – so I need it to be everywhere! These area rugs are so soft and easy to clean! I just throw it in the washer and let it air dry.

3 in 1 Wireless Charging Stand Apple Watch Charger for Apple Watch and iPhone Airpod

This is a lifesaver! I am able to charge 3 items without 3 separate cords!

Fire TV Stick

Wait, do you not have one of these? If you don’t click on it and buy one! I don’t know why you’re waiting.

Pillow Inserts & Luxury Faux Fur Throw Pillow Covers

Here we are with the faux fur again. I love these throw pillows! I have some on my bed and on my couch!

Motivational Gallon Water Bottle

It has motivation on the bottle and time stamps so you can get your water intake each day! How amazing is that?!

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Pets:

Cheetah Dog Collar

I LOVE this collar for Abby! & they just came out with the matching leash! (They didn’t have it at the time I purchased the collar).

Top Entry Cat Litter Box

This is so easy to clean and the top entry makes it impossible for my dog to try and sneak in there for a snack! Haha!

4-in-1 Interactive Cat Toy

My cats will play with this non-stop. Might need to add a few around the house!

Milk-Bone Dog Treats

This big box of dog treats will last you forever and a day!

Jiminy’s Cricket Dog Treats

These treats are SUPER healthy for your pups! Abby loves them.

Dog Nail Clippers

These nail clippers make it so easy to cut my dogs nails – quickly and efficiently!

Burt’s Bees for Dogs All-Natural Paw & Nose Lotion with Rosemary & Olive Oil

I am obsessed with Burt’s Bees products – Especially for my pup! I put these on her after her baths!

Folex Instant Carpet Spot Remover  

If you have pets that sometimes hate you and decide to use your rugs as a bathroom…then you need this! Or if you are clumsy and spill a lot. This carpet spot remover is a miracle in a bottle.

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NOW – Please send me your favorite Amazon items so I can try them out!

I can’t wait to see what you pick!

 

So weird, right?

This whole pandemic thing that has recently consumed every bit of our lives has been a TRIP! Like what is even happening? Right?

I’ve been worried – Just like everyone else. My hours at work got cut in half. Unemployment decided that I only need $40 – Because that makes total sense? Thanks for nothing.

Anyway, I have been freaking out. How will I pay my bills? What about my rent? What is going to happen next? Can I have my full time job back? Is this thing over yet?

YOOOO. Work is back to full time & Thanks to COVID-19 I was financially okay after all.

My hands are crazy dry from all of the constant cleaning and super washing my hands. I mean, it’s a good thing. I love cleaning – but really. Am I going to be okay? Are my loved ones going to be okay? We have to be so careful and so mindful of everyone and everything these days. *which is a good thing**again*

I’ve used FaceTime, Zoom, and other methods of telecommunication more the past 2 months than I ever have in my LIFE. Like I haven’t even met my new Therapist in person. We have video meetings! So weird, right?

My goodness. We never realize how much we interact and touch and share things without a worry until something like this happens and everything comes to a HALT.

The loneliness and fear start to creep in here and there and I think of all of the “What If” possibilities. But today, FINALLY, I stopped myself and that little voice in my head came back and said, “Don’t you remember how big your God is?” Like…OH, DUH!

Everything will be okay. It might not be right now and we might not see the finish line at the moment, but it is there and that is where we are headed! We got this, fam.

Are you?

Everyone has become so accustomed to asking the usual questions. How are you? How was your day? – But they don’t care. It’s not genuine, anyway. It’s word vomit to me. They think it’s okay to ask – you know…the social norm. They’ve been conditioned to ask those questions. They might not even be aware that they are doing it because it’s the first thing that comes out of their mouth.

If you don’t really care, DON’T ask.

How are you? How was your day? How are your pets/kids? How is your family doing? Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend? When are you getting married? Are you going to have children? How many? When? Why?

Everyone always asks questions, but they simply don’t matter.

This is what I mean – Everyone always asks the wrong questions. Some think that by having all of these “things” then you’ll be doing life “right” – they think that all those things are the things that will make you “happy”.

But the question that should really be asked is are you happy? Just you. Because honestly, that is what really matters. I am sorry if no one has ever asked you this. I’d like for you to stop and take a moment and ask yourself. Are you happy? Truly happy? If your answer is no, then change it. Believe that you CAN be happy and that you deserve it – because you do.

I know quite a few people who have gotten into relationships, gotten engaged, gotten married and had children, moved out of the country, stayed at a dead end job for 10+ years, etc. and some of these people – not all – put on a show for everyone that they are happy and everything is perfect; when it is so far from the truth. They are straight up NOT having a good time, bro. 

I never want to be like that. Ever. I feel sorry for those people.

I promised myself that I wouldn’t put on a show for anyone because that is NO way to live and I don’t owe anyone, anything – Not even a fake happily ever after with the wrong person.

You have this one life. Why in the world would you want to waste it by pretending to be happy in a relationship, job, family, state/country, etc. that you truly are miserable in?

Don’t do that to yourself or to others. You deserve so much more. You really do.

Don’t waste anymore of your time. GO NOW. Start taking those steps towards your happiness. Towards the rest of your life.

Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth it? HELL YES.

Follow your gut. Follow your heart. If it is telling you to leave, then LEAVE. GET OUT. Nothing can hold you back…unless it’s you. And that is the sad truth. We are always the only ones holding us back when we actually believe that it’s others who are holding us back. We make excuses and it’s getting old. YOU are getting old.

Don’t wait. You don’t have forever.

I love you LOTS & I care about your happiness & you should too.

Stop & Breathe.

I don’t know about you…but sometimes I do actually forget to breathe. Most of the time it’s when my anxiety begins to creep in from a level 1 and rapidly becomes a level 13 (On a scale 1-10). Thankful for my inhaler though.

So try. Try so hard to stop your brain. I know it’s almost impossible. I get it. I deal with this every single day.

I wish I could tell you why it happens and why it’s so damaging and why it is absolutely terrifying and I wish I could tell you how to stop it completely and how to never have an anxiety or panic attack again…I wish I could tell you, but I cannot.

I don’t have all of the answers, but I have experience and I hope I can be somewhat of assistance to you. The best thing is to try and try again.

Stop that thought, that memory, that image in your mind, stop it right as it begins to torment your soul. Try to not let it take control over you. You are STRONG.

Breathe in that fresh air. Close your eyes and focus on your breathing.

I won’t tell you to get over it, I won’t tell you to calm down, I won’t tell you to just relax, I won’t tell you that you are overreacting and I won’t tell you to stop stressing.

I will encourage you to try to work through your anxiety attacks and those episodes, because I know that eventually, you will. Go easy on yourself. Whatever you get through in this moment & whatever you get through today, let it be enough.

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Affirmations for those struggling with anxiety:

• I am strong and can preserve.
• Everything will be okay. I am okay.
• I did my best and I will learn from this.
• My anxiety will not control me.
• I am courageous and I can make it through.
• This is only temporary.
• I can and will overcome my fears.
• I am capable of solving any problems that come my way.
• I am safe.
• I can take things one step at a time.
• Worry can not change my circumstance.
• Anxiety does not define me.
• I have faith everything will work out.

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(Some of you reading this post may not understand the crippling level of anxiety myself and others experience and that is okay. I hope you never do. What is not okay is to make us feel as if we are weak, too emotional, annoying, stupid, being irrational, etc. Again, NOT OKAY).

Friends, I really hope this helps you even the slightest bit. I am fully aware that this won’t magically take away all your anxiety (although I wish it could), I know it won’t take all mine away.

BUT, I also know that having people in your life who understand your anxiety and exactly what you go through day in and day out…helps. It helps to have those people you can reach out to when you’re in the middle of a breakdown and have nowhere to turn for help. It helps knowing that you’re feelings are valid and that you’re not alone. 

Please reach out. Don’t stay in your confined space and not let anyone in. (I do believe in boundaries and protecting your heart…so by all means, guard your heart). But, those you can trust enough to let them inside and help you, please let them. Like always, I am always here, even when I am struggling myself.

 

Run.

I run away when things are good. I don’t know how to handle them. It’s like being on the edge of a cliff waiting for a gust of wind to push you off.

I run to comfort and safety. But for me that isn’t at all what I mean, what I mean is that our definitions of those two words are completely different, I’m sure.

I am a very self destructive person (Not my best trait, but I’m being honest) (Can I add in that I’m working on it?). Comfort and safety for me is familiarity in the danger zones. It’s messing everything up, before it messes me up. It’s hurting myself when I’m angry with others. It’s digging my nails into the sides of my legs as I try to breathe slowly. It’s picking up the bottle and pouring that drink. It’s everything that is wrong consuming all of my being at once.

PC: Kelly Meighan 

I run again and again. I can’t seem to get far enough away. I run from people and relationships and anything that scares me. I run from feelings and dreams. I don’t like it, not at all. I wish I would stop at the stop signs and slow down for the caution tape, but I don’t.

I run to things that make me feel pain. It’s like an addiction that I can’t break away from. It sucks at times…this addiction poisons everything in my life. Everything I do. But I run back to it every single time, because I am comfortable there, in that hole. It continues to grow deeper and deeper. It’s like coming home from a long trip of sleeping in a tent and finally being able to snuggle up in your own bed. You crave it & when you are finally back in that hole, you are “home”.

Heavy

She had a pretty face, a nice smile, a cute laugh, but she had some of the saddest eyes you’d ever seen.

She wondered day in and day out if she would ever feel true happiness ever again. She woke up in the morning and her brain immediately started reliving the things from yesterday, the day before and the day before that. She was reminding herself of conversations and overthinking every little piece of them. She was doubting herself and telling herself that they didn’t really care about her. She had so much weight upon her shoulders and she would not let it go. She was exhausted.

She gets ready for bed and lays wide awake for hours on end because her brain will not shut off. She takes a handful of sleeping pills hoping they will silence the demons inside. She falls asleep, she thinks she is finally safe and able to dream of a reality that is so far beyond her reach. No. Instead, she has nightmares reliving some of the most painful parts of her life. She wakes up in a cold sweat, screaming, only to find herself alone in her bed with nothing but a few extra pillows surrounding her and blankets on the cold floor.

This was heavy. It was constant. It was painful.

Sometimes amongst the confusion and all of the commotion, she can find somewhere to rest. At least for a little while. During that time of rest, things don’t feel as heavy, and she can take that deep breath again.

Standing in a Crowd.

Standing in a crowd full of strangers. People I didn’t know, some I wanted to get to know and others I just didn’t really care for. I looked at everyone and wondered where they came from, I wondered who they missed and I wondered what they were sorry for.

Who were they thinking of? Why were their hearts breaking? Do they remember the name of their childhood best friend? What was it like growing up in their home? Did they sit in the back seat of their mom’s van staring at others in cars wondering what their lives were like? What did they dream of at night? What did they want in this life?

Standing in a crowd full of people. People who have all felt joy, sadness, pain and anger. People who have fallen in love and people who have had to crawl out of love. People who try their hardest everyday just to get by. I looked at everyone and felt everything and nothing all at once. People are often more similar than we think, and yet we always feel alone.

Who did they want to be? What did they think of themselves? Were they proud of their accomplishments or were they afraid of seeing their reflection? What were their goals? What did they hope for? What were they afraid of? What were they waiting for?

Kelly Meighan Photography

Standing in a crowd full of everyone I have ever come in contact with. Wow. With all of these memories surrounding me like a tornado, I wait. Sometimes standing in a crowd can make you feel like you’re suffocating. It can make you feel anxious and terrified. Sometimes standing in a crowd can make you feel excited. It can make you feel tranquil and joyful. I try to make sense of it all, all of the memories and all of the connections, but maybe, just maybe I’m not supposed to. Maybe it’s time to start living in acceptance of what things are and what they will be.

Standing in a crowd, I am okay. It will be okay.

 

I can’t blame you.

I can’t blame you for my broken heart. Although I would absolutely LOVE to blame you, I can’t. I can’t do that because it isn’t your fault, entirely.

I need to stop trying to change people that don’t want to change. I need to stop giving chances to people who abuse my forgiveness. I need to stop walking back to the place where my heart ran from. I need to stop trusting words, and ignoring actions. I need to stop giving my all to people who give me nothing. I need to stop fighting for a relationship when I’m standing in the ring alone. I need to stop breaking my own heart. 

I need to stop breaking my own heart, because I am not sure how much more it can take.

I’m taking responsibility for myself.  & by taking responsibility for myself I mean that I am removing myself from people and situations that I know, deep down, were only going to continue to hurt me in the long run.

Friends, if this post tugged on something inside of you, I want to encourage you to listen to your “gut” (intuition). Listen to it and take a moment and feel what you are feeling. Only you know how you feel. Only you.

Your purpose in life is NOT to sit around waiting or begging for people to treat you right, to care about you or to love you. Screw them. You deserve better and there will be better people out there for you. Your tribe is out there. I am slowly, but surely, finding my tribe. I know it is scary and I know that sometimes the comfortability feels better than the unknown. I get it. Trust your journey.

Holding onto letting go is the hardest part. All those empty promises and the actions that spoke louder than words…I can’t blame you for not ever being the person I thought you were. I can’t blame you for not living up to the potential that I once saw in you. Those were my expectations and now they are my disappointments. I can’t blame you, I blame myself for holding onto something that wasn’t real, for holding onto something that was breaking my heart.